Bad Day…

Today has been a bad day all around.

This morning, I had an appointment at the IVF clinic for a blood test and ultrasound and had to wait two hours, with my son in tow.  He was so good, but he was miserable, saying over and over that he just wanted to go home. 

My ultrasound revealed that I’m not responding as well to the ovulatory-stimulation medications as I did during my first IVF cycle two months ago.  During a woman’s normal monthly cycle, one ovary releases one egg from one follicle.  During my IVF cycles, the two medications I’m injecting—Gonal-f® every night and Menopur® every morning—put both ovaries into overdrive, with multiple follicles developing on each side, from which the IVF doctor will retrieve one egg each. 

In June, I had four follicles in my right ovary and more than 15 in my left ovary, resulting in the retrieval of 19 eggs.  But, eight eggs were not mature enough to fertilize, one didn’t fertilize, six embryos were chromosomally abnormal, and two healthy embryos stopped developing, so, on the morning of embryo transfer, we were left with only two embryos.  We transferred the one deemed by the embryologist to be the strongest, and we cryopreserved the other.  Our embryo didn’t implant, so here we are on IVF Cycle #2.  We’re going to try to transfer two embryos this time, so I am stimulating my ovaries again.

Because I responded so well to the medications during my first IVF cycle, my doctor said he was keeping the exact same protocol.  However, this morning I had only eight follicles developing—five on my right and three on my left.  This time, my body, just two months older, but within days of turning 41, isn’t cooperating. 

The IVF coordinator just called with the results of my blood test and said my Estradiol (estrogen) is only 167, which is low.  Today is my fifth day taking the ovulatory-stimulation medications, and it’s only 167.  Two months ago, on the fourth day, my Estradiol was 288.  So, my doses are being increased from 225 to 300 IU of Gonal-f every night and from 150 to 225 IU of Menopur every morning, and I go back in on Monday for another blood test and ultrasound.

After my son’s and my four hours involved with IVF this morning—driving to downtown Chicago in rush-hour traffic for an 8:30 a.m. appointment, waiting two hours, having the blood test, having the ultrasound, then driving home—we went to McDonalds as a treat because he was so well-behaved.  Then we came home, and I slept for three hours while he watched television next to me.  These medications are so debilitating, and I feel guilty that he is being affected by my lethargy, albeit only for a week and a half.

At 4:30 p.m., we went to pick up my stepsons for the weekend, and they weren’t there.  My son is so sad.  My husband is angry.  I just feel numb.

I stopped by the convenience store to get more regular Coke, so I now have energy again.  My husband is on his way home from the Cubs game, and, when he gets home, we’re going next door for a neighborhood party.  I considered not going because I feel tired and sad, but it will be good for my son to play with his friends, after being cooped up in the car, doctor’s office and house all day, and it will be good for me to focus on something other than infertility treatments.

Husband just walked in.  We’re off…

  1. Kristen
    July 24th, 2009 at 22:12
    Reply | Quote | #1

    That does sound like a really bad day. I hope tonight sleep comes to you, my friends, because it sounds like you need your energy. Hope the neighborhood party was fun for your little guy (who sounds like a great dude! loved the post about how he says he loves you to space and back–so precious.)

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